A Gift-Giving "What Would You Do"

Just suppose....    

Your neighbor gave birth to her second child in September. You’re not particularly close to your neighbor, but you’re very neighborly and visit on the street. You’ve had several casual visits with the family, popping into each others’ yards for conversation since the second child arrived. You feel you have a bit of a “connection” too, since you both became first-time moms around the same time.

Before baby #2 was born, you bought the neighbor’s first child a little gift – a “big brother” gift. You planned to give it to the neighbor when you gave her a little something commemorating baby #2’s birth.

The thing is, you haven’t yet gotten around to buying anything for the new baby. So, you decide that you could give the little gift to the “big brother” for his 2nd birthday in November.

His birthday comes & goes. You weren’t invited to the party, and you feel awkward just bringing a birthday gift over. You’re scratching your head a little about not being invited to the birthday party, since your boys are close in age and kind of like little friends. It’s really no biggee though – maybe they just had family and close friends for the party.

And now, Christmas approaches. You’re contemplating getting a little something for the new baby – now almost 4 months old – and giving the 2-year-old his little something, at last.

But you don’t want to set a precedent or make the neighbors think you want to swap kids gifts at Christmas all the time. They might feel obligated to reciprocate, and that certainly isn’t your intention.

On the other hand, your own son would enjoy the little something you got for the “big brother” neighbor. So you could just say to hell with it all and give the one gift you’ve purchased to your own child. And then you’d just have to deal with feeling semi-smuckish for never having done anything for neighbor baby #2’s arrival.

Hmm.

So, you’re in my shoes – what do you do?

Comments

[ribbiticus]

oh dear! what a dilemma! i wouldn't worry too much about it, seeing as your neighbor hasn't been much of a neighbor to you too. i hope your son enjoyed his gift! :)

michele sent me.

[nat]

First, you laugh at the whole thing! Since it seems like you've done that, you go ahead and not-give the baby gift, and just wait for the baby's first bday and give something then!

[caltechgirl]

pretty much.

[Pearl]

Yep, give your kid the gift. The situation will become clear or right itself in time. You could speed things up and ask outright about the idea of you exchanging gifts between families.

[Marie]

Thanks for your comments on this... the neighbors will be getting cookies from me this year, so hopefully they won't think I'm a total schmo... and they'll never miss the little gift! ;-)

[running2ks]

Geez, I guess I'd say "Hi! I meant to give this to you sooner, but here is a gift for the new baby, oh I guess not-so-new now, my how the baby has grown. So Cute! And something for the big brother (so he won't be jealous). Anyway, see you again soon!"

[running2ks]

D'Oh! So I didn't see you decided, and cookies are perfect (which is what I do for my neighbors and they love it). Alrighty then. la lal alla lalllalllllaaaaa, dancing off now...