PractiGal

Balloonogram for my boy

What kind of party does one throw for a miniature person who doesn't speak English yet, who regularly fills his pants, who crawls to everything imaginable, and who has only 4 teeth?  I'm starting to think about my baby boy's first birthday. It's just a few weeks away!

We'll have balloons. He loves balloons!  And remote controls for everyone. And bananas... he loves bananas!

But cake? My baby hasn't had much real food yet... what do I do, puree some cake & ice cream for him? He hasn't had anything with sugar in it yet (other than natural sugars in fruit), so I'm not so sure about the cake deal. He already goes, goes, goes like the Energizer bunny; I really can't imagine adding sugar to the equation.

I imagine all of us singing happy birthday to him & having him cry... since he startles easily. I may have to instruct everyone to sing softly for the guest of honor this time.

And presents? People are beginning to ask us "what would be good for his birthday?" How about a variety of cardboard boxes. Different shapes, sizes, colors, and densities. As far as I can tell, it really doesn't get any better than a good box when you're approaching your first birthday. Oh, and wheels. He likes to play with wheels.

Mostly, I'd like our families to come together and hug our little boy. (Pardon the schmaltz, but I just want my boy to know how much he's loved!)

For him, the day will come and go just like any other day. But I'm the Mom, and it's his first birthday!!! There will be a joyous celebration.

A Date with My Hubby

Welcome to everyone visiting from Michele's! Thanks for stopping by!

Last night, instead of putting on my sweat pants at 7p.m., I put on my lipstick! I had a date with my husband! We don't go on many dates since our son arrived, so this was a special treat for us. Grandma is visiting from out of town and offered to man the homefront while my husband and I went out, just the two of us. (Yes, my mother-in-law is a peach!)

We went to one of our favorite restaurants, and had a lovely evening. Before our son was born, we ate out regularly and didn't cook too much at home. These days, I cook all the time, and I've gotten so used to it being "the 3 of us." It was kind of strange to have it be just the 2 of us. Strange but nice... we don't often get to have a conversation without our beautiful babbling baby boy butting in.

I did notice that my nice pants are pretty snug... I guess I'm a little too used to sweatpants. I managed to unbutton them, somewhat discreetly, so that I could enjoy the meal.

After dinner, it was only 9:00, and we thought about what we could do. Go shopping for a new VCR?  No, the stores probably close by 9. Stop for a drink? No, that would put us both to sleep instantly... It had been an early day with the baby. I knew we needed dish soap and yogurt at home, so we stopped at the grocery store. Just the 2 of us. Hot date, huh?

I guess you know you're a Mom when you're thinking of what you need at home in your "free time." 

Time to work on fitting into those pants more easily! I'm already thinking of where we can go on our next date...

Is it just me?

You know you have a problem when your husband and mother-in-law are relaxing, enjoying a movie, and you're glued to your computer, working on Michele's scavenger hunt, and starting your "100 things" list for your blog.

NoLeaky

Sometimes the grocery store puts me into a daze - maybe it's the bright lights and all the colors. It's a good thing I usually bring a list, otherwise I'd draw a complete blank at the store. I knew my list was a little sketchy yesterday, so as I zipped up and down the aisles I hoped all the items I thought I'd just remember we need would hit me in the head and jump into the cart.

Any way, I was passing through the personal care aisle, and the names of two side by side items struck me: Depend and Prevail.  I had never heard of Prevail. Depend yes, Prevail no. Imagine naming a product that would be a competitor to Depend, adult undergarments?  I suppose we'll all need them someday. When you're in the market for these items, of course you'll want something on which you can depend, and you'll hope that the product you choose will prevail. Is one name better than the other? Will one draw more buyers?

If you were entering this market as a competitor, what would you name your product?

Flashback Part III - getting to March 1, 2004

If you've been following the first 2 installments, I'm imagining the look on your face. (If you haven't, go back & read Part I first! Not to be pushy, but Go!)  The look I imagine is the one my friends had on their faces at my baby shower: very wide eyes, with a forced smile. And behind that look, in your head you're thinking - "they're freaking nuts." Right?

My husband read what I've written so far. He pointed out all the things I haven't told you about... relax, I said. I'm not done yet! He corrected me on a few technical details; I told him I didn't think you'd care. He was also amazed that people are interested in this escapade. He says no one appreciates a handyman til they need one. Aww! I appreciate you, lovey!

Anyway, where were we?...  Ah, yes. Waiting for all sorts of deliveries... floor, cabinets, baby.

You know, when you're pregnant, the due date is just an estimate for when your baby may arrive. Some people go early - sometimes 2 weeks (or more) early. Not a day went by when that fact didn't cross our minds. There was some tension in our house, and you could cut it with the plastic knives we were using while dining in the living room.

Since there was some waiting time, there were tasks that could be completed without the flooring and cabinets. The gas stove was to be relocated, since we were adding counter space and cupboards, and the gas pipes needed to be moved. And this shifted things a bit, so that the fridge was going to block the heating vent. So, the ductwork needed to be redone, so that the heat would come out in a new location in the kitchen. Details, details! Hubby was actually going to call a plumber (I was relieved!), but decided he'd give it a shot himself. (Harumph, I said) I was very nervous about the gas pipe work. What if the house blows up? My husband isn't a plumber, though he's done a good deal of plumbing on our house & our rental property (which was his home before we were married). I figured having no house to come home to with the baby would be worse than a torn-up kitchen. I wasn't home for that part of the job, and I breathed a massive sigh of relief when I came home & the house was still standing. Thank you, God.

In addition to the ductwork, there was wall paper stripping, sanding, paint selection...  We got a steamer that really helped with the stripping of the paper. The paper had probably been stuck there for 20 years or so, and parts were stubborn. This was a great job for a nesting momma - strip a little paper, sit down, strip a little paper, sit down. Yes, welcome to the loony bin. We decided to tackle just the 2 walls that were being partially updated, since time was of the essence (ahem).

Just in case we (hubby) might get bored, there was a leak under the kitchen sink that needed fixing. The sink was going, but the plumbing was staying. Couldn't be having leaks in our new sink cabinet!

Is your head spinning yet?

The flooring arrived in good time. My husband prepared a giant template for cutting the heavy-duty linoleum. He took the template & flooring over to a big empty room in an unrented apartment at the other house & cut out the floor. He brought it home & attached it to the "underlayment" (I've learned that's what it's called). It was a beautiful thing. We had a floor once again.

Miracle of miracles... the cabinets, estimated at 3-6 weeks for delivery, arrived at 3 weeks. There was much song and praise.

The countertop, however, was another story. We selected a color & style that was supposed to be in-stock. My husband drove to every Home Depot in greater Monroe County looking for the pieces we needed. We were (ok, he was) fitting them in a corner, so we needed specific corner pieces, which apparently were scarce. OK, maybe we can choose a different color.... but I like the blue!  Hubby searched on, and got the pieces we needed, in blue. Phew.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the crazy pregnant lady was in full nesting mode:  scrubbing the bathtub and the bathroom ceiling (mildew). Then once that was clean, of course I needed a clean shower curtain liner. It looked great after I washed it, but I left it in the dryer a little too long. Nothing worse than melted shower curtain liner as you approach your due date.

I wasn't taking phonecalls anymore. Email yes, phonecalls no. I was so tired of it... "Well, any news?"  Uh, yeah we had the baby and forgot to tell you.  And "how's the kitchen going." I told my husband I wasn't answering the f-ing phone any more.

No time for that. I was busy making multiple trips to KMart for baskets and dividers for our new kitchen drawers. If there was a hidden camera watching me, I'm sure the store security people had some chuckles. "Hey, that pregnant lady is back AGAIN for drawer crap. Doesn't she have anything better to do?"  Hmm. Frankly, no. I didn't!

I don't know how it happened, but somehow, the moon and the stars must have been lined up just so.

And the prayers from the people who were e-mailing and calling must have gotten through to the right place.

Because on February 29th, leap day, the day before my due date, this picture was taken. My husband had just installed the new hardware on the cabinets, and we were ready to run the dishwasher for the first time.

Maybe someday, if we decide to have a second child, we'll redo the upper half of the kitchen. Though I've really grown fond of the duct tape patch on the ceiling.

Ahh, but that's another story!

(click photos to enlarge)

Flashback - Part II

Freakin computers. Just when I was ready to write the second installment, we had to do a full-cavity search on this computer. It was behaving more oddly than usual. Hopefully we've eradicated the varmint.

OK, where was I?  Oh, yes... the kitchen floor destruction had commenced.

So, up til then, we had tossed around the idea of a portable dishwasher -- the kind that would have required no demolition. Just plunk it in the kitchen and wheel it over to the sink as needed. But the floor was SO old and disgusting; I had a hormonal meltdown when I thought of my baby crawling around on it. Maybe some of you can relate? Well, once I heard the power tools ripping up the floor, I knew we were full steam ahead. No turning back. This would be the full treatment.

Full steam ahead we were. And it was mid-January. A very snowy month... and oh, my husband has a few snow-plowing commitments. Every handyman has to have a pickup truck, you know, and his used truck came with a plow attached. Hence, he does some plowing. January 2004 was a very snowy month and hubby was out plowing a LOT, while I was home pacing the torn up kitchen, wondering how the heck it was going to come together.

I don't remember the exact chronology of events. I think I have blocked out some of the experience for my own survival. My husband would know the precise order of things (honey, if you're reading this I'm so excited!! I may be a little off on the order here, but they'll get the overall story). But...

There was the purchase of the new microwave. I thought I'd just swing by WalMart on my way home from work and pick up the microwave I wanted. We were setting up a make-shift cooking area in the dining room, and now was as good a time as ever to replace the mini microwave we had been using from my single days. Any fool knows that you don't just whip in and out of a super WalMart at 6:00pm, so while I easily found the microwave I wanted (& another customer to help me hoist it atop a shopping cart), actually purchasing it and getting it out of the store was another matter. I stood in a ridiculous line behind people with mountains of junk. And I do mean mountains, and I do mean junk. I never studied others' purchases so closely - not that it was any of my business! but what else was I going to do? When I finally got to check out, I asked the clerk for help getting it to my car. The box wasn't exactly secure on top of the cart, and the parking lot was covered with slippery cookie-dough-like snow. Not a good combination with a hugely pregant nutcase. Sure! She said... no problem. So I waited and waited. ... bleep! ... bleep! (that annoying cash register sound) bleep!...  I thought I'd have a total meltdown, right there at the front of the store. They were SO busy... like anyone was going to answer my cashier's page for help. NOT. So a nice couple in line after me took pity on me and offered to help; the man carried the microwave to my car, and I was OUT OF THERE! When I got home, if my husband had any doubts whether I had a speck of sanity left, I think this outing took care of that.

Then there was the subfloor. Did you know that underneath your floor there is a subfloor? Well, I didn't know that, but frankly that seemed like a heckofa lot more work than the actual floor. First, the kitchen floor had been very creaky, so my husband did a lot of nailing to eliminate the creaks. Then there was the placement of these big boards (called something that I don't remember) to make the subfloor. Once that was down, I thought we were in business & that we'd have a floor soon. No. The seams between the pieces of subfloor had to be filled with goop (the technical term), then the goop had to dry & be sanded. Ugh. That was a royal mess. Fortunately we have a door between the kitchen and dining room, so we were able to somewhat contain the flying debris. I remember my husband coming in to the living room coated with gray dust - face, hair, clothes. The father of my child... working his ass off.

There were lots of frozen dinners cooked in that new microwave. The freezer (in the dining room) was piled high with delightful choices. There was takeout food. There were even a few home-cooked meals. Once the gas stove was moved into the living room, we were out of luck, but the little burner thing I picked up when I got the microwave was a help. Have you ever grilled burgers in your living room? Made a spaghetti dinner? It's all possible. Most importantly, that burner provided me with a good cup o' tea every day. I have to boil the water; microwaved water just isn't the same.

There were many nights when I took my Maaolox around 9:30 and headed to bed, while the power tools continued to whir in the kitchen below.

Oh, and the cabinets. After the removal of the floor, I got an e-mail from my husband while I was at work. He had ordered the new cabinets we wanted. Great!  And they'd be delivered in 3-6 weeks. Excuse me? The floor was removed 6 weeks before my due date... we didn't have a moment to spare. You mean 3-6 days, right? No, 3-6 weeks. I was freaking out. Yes. My co-workers tried to calm me -- well, there's nothing like a deadline? right? Um, yeah, right. Tell me about it. My little deadline was getting huger by the second, and I had bruises on my sides from laying on them. I was tired and nervous. My husband seemed calm and confident. I kept reminding him... I'm not going to be much help you know. Yes, yes, he was well aware of that. Don't worry, there's plenty of time.

Things had to be done in a certain order too. The floor had to happen first, then the cabinets, then the countertop, then the sink and finally, the dishwasher. Did I mention there was a delay on the flooring? It wasn't in stock... had to be ordered. Yep.

In between, my husband added electrical outlets and circuits to beat the band. This area is a specialty for him, so let me say we are well wired!! We might have 5 times the number of outlets we once had. Beauty. I knew that someday we'd be able to plug in the stove, fridge, microwave... and ultimately, the dishwasher - the inspiration for this entire project.

Meanwhile, it continued to snow... he had to go take care of plowing... I paced for 3 deliveries: the floor, the cabinets, and a baby.

Stay tuned... for tomorrow's stunning conclusion! :-)

Flashback Part I - Preparing for March 1st, 2004

As my son’s first birthday approaches (just a few weeks away), I’m finding myself thinking back to those final days of pregnancy, as we prepared for "the arrival." We knew our lives would change, but it’s hard to imagine what it will be like til you experience it. Incredible. Overwhelming. Exhausting. Miraculous. Those are a few of the words I’d use to describe how our lives have changed since our little boy arrived. But I’m not going to get all sappy on you today. I’m going to tell you about the home-improvement project we undertook, just before our son’s birth.

Being the practical gal that I am, I had specific wants before the baby’s arrival. I wanted a crib, a car seat, and a glider rocker. To be expected, I suppose. Unlike many expectant moms, I didn’t want a room redone as a nursery. It would have been nice if we'd gotten to paint his room, but it didn't happen. The 2 things I wanted were a dishwasher and a generator. How incredibly boring, huh? I know. I realized that we wouldn't be going out to eat all the time after the baby arrived; we'd be doing more cooking & eating at home, so we'd need a dishwasher. And since I was due March 1st, I was afraid of coming home from the hospital to an ice storm that would knock out our power. I'm not really paranoid... those things do happen here.

We got the generator, and it was easy enough to pick out a dishwasher. But in this old house (circa 1929), the cabinets weren't ones that could accommodate a dishwasher. In fact, the kitchen was in dire need of a facelift. This was my house before we were married, and I hadn't done anything to it by the time my handyman husband moved in. He thought, why not replace the lower cabinets, to start updating the kitchen & to accommodate the dishwasher. Well, OK. The counter top was old & ugly and needed to be replaced... and while we're at it, the sink, and oh, the floor was really bad. And then there was the electrical system; no where near the number of outlets & circuits that were needed.

Anyway, there was a lot of talk about the kitchen. There were sketches of possible redesigns... while we were at it! There were many trips to home improvement stores to check out cabinets, countertop, flooring, hardware... Oh, and let me tell you, when you're immensely pregnant, as I was for all of this, there are places for you to sit down at those stores:  on the display toilets. I frequently wandered off to rest there.

I didn't think this would actually happen before the baby... time was getting tight. Tick tock went the huge kicking baby clock in my belly.

6 weeks before my due date, I heard the sound of a power tool in the kitchen. The kitchen project had begun. My husband was removing the floor. Yes, 6 weeks before the baby was expected to arrive, the gutting of our kitchen began. This was right around the time that I was crazily getting things in order. Before I knew it, the refrigerator was relocated to the dining room, and there was talk of removing the lower cabinets. We hadn't yet ordered the replacement cabinets, and I was nervous! What if we have no kitchen to bring the baby home to?! I insisted that we have a functional kitchen when the baby arrived. Have I mentioned that my husband doesn't hire work out? He does it all himself!

How would it all come together? I was nervous about having a baby and stressed about having our kitchen torn up... that was just one year ago.

More on this in the coming days... I'll let you know how it went... In the meantime, here are a couple of pictures of the "projects" that were underway at that time: January 2004.

Floor removed...old cabinets still in place

So long cabinets

Mama awaits baby and dishwasher!

Snuggling in...

We're preparing for a c-c-cold weekend here in NY. Last I heard, it was 2 degrees outside, before factoring in the windchill. Brrr. We're supposed to get a foot of snow or so, which is big for us this year. Usually a big snow event here is a few feet, but with hardly any flakes so far this winter, they're talking this one up.

I'm ready! I have fixins for chili, homemade soups, hot chocolate, plus movies...  And plenty o' diapers for the babe. We have Love Actually and A Mighty Wind. They look like picks I'll like, though I doubt my hubby will enjoy them. He'd rather watch American Chopper reruns for the 19th time. Plus, he'll be out plowing the neighbors out. Any way, I'm ready to stay inside & cozy for the duration.

Yesterday, a friend in North Carolina e-mailed me about her area shutting down after 1" of snow. She's a former upstate NY-er, so she was chuckling. There must be more to it than was reported... kids had to stay overnight at school after 1" of snow?!

What's going on for the weekend where you are?

Oh, I almost forgot! There's a fabulous party going on this weekend, and we're all invited. Check it out if you're game. It's a black tie red-carpet affair honoring the nominees of the recent Best of Blog Awards. I plan on attending in my sweats (shhh, don't tell), but anyone who's anyone on the blogosphere is bound to drop by. Come on by!

ps -- Would you like a gmail account? Gmail is Google's beta web-based mail program. I have some invitations, just send me an e-mail if you'd like one...

Idol Daydream

There aren’t a lot of tv shows that I follow regularly. In fact, I’m really kind of unhip when it comes to tv/pop-culture. OK, so I’m unhip in other ways too, if you must know. Today, I’m coming clean on the fact that I am a fan of American Idol. Yes, it’s true. It may be kind of hokey, but it’s good clean fun. I got hooked in Season 3 (a year ago), so I’m relatively new on the scene. I even watched it from my hospital bed while I was in labor last year!

FOX began showing Season 4 auditions this week. If you don’t follow the show, let me just say that the auditions are a RIOT. Anybody, and I do mean anybody, can "try out" for the show. There are some people who can sing, but the most entertaining ones are the ones who think they can, but can’t. They show people preparing to enter the audition room, proclaiming that they have what it takes to be the next American Idol. Then the second they open their mouths to sing, you wonder what planet they’re from. Are they serious? Most of them seem to be – that’s what makes it so darn funny.

I suppose it’s my love of music that makes me tune in. When I was thinking about college majors, I had it narrowed down to music and math. I didn’t think I was good enough on my clarinet to be a performer, and I didn’t want to teach, so I chose to go the math route. (Because there’s so much you can do with a math major, right?) I did it all in high school though: wind ensemble, marching band, orchestra, and chorus. I was the epitome of music geek.

Mostly, I enjoy singing these days. It’s been a while since I’ve dusted off the clarinet. Most of my singing takes place in the car now. Years ago, my buddies and I would do karaoke many a Friday night (I know, you’re laughing at me). We didn’t go to drink much; mainly we went to sing. I gravitated toward the music of Karen Carpenter, Bonnie Raitt, and Pat Benatar, to name a few. Yeah, quite an eclectic rocker. I even sang in a garage-style band with a bunch of co-workers, years back.

So yes, I can carry a tune. But, I’m too old for American Idol. Even though they’ve raised the age limit to 28, I still don’t make the cut. But if I could… I wonder what my audition would be like. What would Randy, Paula, and Simon have to say to me? Hmmm….

(Imagine me on stage belting it out before the judges – one of my usual numbers, or perhaps a Tracy Chapman or Alison Krauss tune…. I finish and wait to hear from the judges)

Randy: (Nodding in agreement) Nice. You’ve got it going, girl. I like your style. A little stiff, but you can sing.

Paula: I like your voice, sweetie. You’d need to work on stage presence, but you’ve got a voice.

me: Thanks, Randy. Thanks, Paula. Yeah, I like to sing. I guess I’m more a singer than a performer.

Simon: You do realize that we’re looking for a star, right? We’re looking for the next American Idol. That means what you do on-stage matters. Yes, you can carry a tune, but do you have what it takes to be a star?

me: Yes, I know what you’re looking for. I watch the show. I’ll need some coaching on stage presence, but…

Simon: But what?! And look at how you’re dressed. You look like a frumpy old lady.

me: Well, I’m 39, but I don’t consider myself frumpy. And once your wardrobe people get hold of me, I’m sure they’ll help me spruce up my look.

Simon: You know, you need to lose some weight. You’re fat.

me: Well, yes, I do need to drop some pounds. I’m sure the right clothes, and a pair of Spanx, will help to highlight my "better" features, like my face and hair.

Simon: Your face? You have oily skin. Have you tried exfoliating? You know, I JUST don’t know that you have what it takes.

Paula: Oh, come on. The girl can sing.

Simon: We’re looking for a star. I’m sure she’s a charming person, but she has no stage presence, her thighs are too big, and well, her complexion…

me: So, I’ll take that as a no. Simon, may you rot…

(cut to commercial break)

Oh well, I wonder what Donald Trump would say if he met me. My other tv addiction, The Apprentice, starts tonight. Ahh, but that’s another daydream…

Ed. note:  (1/21)  I have learned that one of my karaoke buddies, whom I haven't seen in years, passed away this week. May you rest in peace, CP.

Having a Dream

There was an article in yesterday's paper that caught my eye. It was about a local woman who has dreamed of being a funeral director since she was a child. I read the article in awe and disbelief. This was so much her passion, that she turned down a full ride to the Rochester Institute of Technology to go to mortuary school. Wow! Huh?

It's great that we're all into such different things. I'm glad that there are some people who really truly want to be funeral directors. Hopefully not too many though -- how many funeral directors do you need? Granted, we're all going to need one eventually, but I wonder how you know if there will be a demand for this profession?

Funeral directing has never crossed my mind as a career of interest. I think of Lurch from The Munsters when I think of a funeral director. I know they're not all like Lurch, and certainly the lady in the article looks nothing like him. But that's the image I have planted in my brain next to "funeral director."

I took a class on Death and Dying when I was in college -- not to learn about funeral directing, but to try to get hold of my fear of losing family members. I had never lost anyone close to me, and had quite a fear of the fact that it would happen some day. Any way, we took a tour of a funeral home in this class. I remember seeing the embalming room and feeling like I might keel over. People do this for a living?!

Not me.

When I was a child I wanted to be a Shoe Lady. You know, the kind that measures your feet and fits you with shoes at a store. I don't think I thought of the fact that a lot of feet stink. Imagine going to work every day and having the focal point of your day be smelly feet? I don't know, maybe it would be better than dead people, but not much better. My best friend's father had a part-time job working at a shoe store, evenings and weekends. I thought it was the coolest. Maybe it was the little measuring device that I was fascinated with, or perhaps it was the fact that shoe salespeople get to go into that mysterious back room where there are stacks and stacks of shoe boxes, and then they get to pull out a variety of boxes and bring them out for a customer's review.

I've always had issues with foot pain. A podiatrist prescribed orthopedic shoes for me when I was in 4th grade. We had to go to a special store in the next town to get my hideously ugly maroon orthopedic shoes. One of my teachers commented on them when I wore them with a dress; they really were ugly, but can you imagine a teacher saying something that makes a kid feel even more self-conscious? Like I wasn't already traumatized by having to wear glasses. Scarred for life. OK, not really, but I hardly wore the corrective shoes after that. These days, it's not uncommon for me to wear $80 shoes with a $5 shirt. My arches need serious support, otherwise I'm in pain, so I spare no expense when it comes to my feet.

So maybe that's why I aspired to be a Shoe Lady. I knew that people could have problems with their feet, and I wanted to help them... to make their steps more comfy, before they get to the funeral director.